Learning Archery...before the battle!

A few years ago, I was listening to recording after recording of Sri Sri's talks and Q&A sessions on Youtube. I was not looking for anything specific - just listening. I was, and still am, always amazed at the number of questions he answers, and how each question is somehow also my personal question - some are questions that I am consciously aware of and want to ask Sri Sri, and others are questions that I am not consciously aware of, but ring a kind of "wake up" bell in my mind :)

I remember that back in those days, my life (both personal and professional) was moving smoothly and was soft and comfortable like a bed of roses. I had been admitted to a prestigious Ph.D. program, where (I was told), I was considered a promising candidate. My personal life was beautiful (I had met the love of my life - my hubby - around that time :)) Yet, I felt very strongly that my everyday practice of yoga and Sudarshan Kriya brought a certain depth to my life and to the joy that I experienced in everyday things. I was very grateful to my mom and my friends who had skilfully "forced" me into learning and practicing Sudarshan Kriya every day. But the question that came into my mind every now and then was - how can I know whether the spiritual path, the practice of Sudarshan Kriya, meditation, the beautiful practical wisdom from Sri Sri that I loved listening to, was really helping me become a better, more caring, more centered, more calm and more skilful person? This question, I was not able to find any answer to.

So that day, as I browsed through various recorded talks of Sri Sri on Youtube, I chanced upon one in which a person asked - "Guruji, when I am in the midst of a rage of temper, no knowledge comes to my rescue. No breathing technique, nothing helps. In such situations, what can I do to prevent or immediately calm down my temper and my mind?" Sri Sri shook his head with a compassion and love that is ever present in his eyes: "You can do nothing. It is like wanting to learn archery in a battlefield." (meaning you will lose the battle :))

I realised in this instant that the regular practice of Sudarshan Kriya and meditation during the best and smoothest times of our lives is like learning archery well before the battle starts. It helps us become stronger and more skilled to face the hardest times that we might face (later) in life. And inevitably, in this life, we all go through rough and smooth patches. In fact, many a times, I have experienced that the awareness and calmness that the regular practice of these techniques brings to my mind, helps me avert situations that might otherwise have become really nasty and difficult.

I remembered another time when a senior teacher of the Art of Living said - when someone is drowning in front of your eyes, you can't give them sermons about "why didn't you learn how to swim?" At that time, you have to help them come out of the water in what ever way possible. You have to encourage people to learn swimming well before they reach a (possible) situation where they may be close to drowning OR after you have helped them out the first time over.

It is interesting that soon after I heard this piece of wisdom from Sri Sri on Youtube, my life's circumstances took many unexpected turns - I went through several years of difficulties - shocks at the personal and professional front, and long periods of extremely bad physical health. In fact, those of you who know me most closely are perhaps aware that it is only now that I am slowly coming out of this phase and reverting to a "normal" life. Yet, I suspect that many of you who know me a little less closely, might be surprised to hear that I was going through any type of hell the last few years at all - right? ;) It is during these last few years that I have felt the greatest and deepest sense of gratitude to everyone who is responsible for bringing, and lovingly holding me on this path and ensuring that I keep up my breathing practice, and through it my high spirits, despite all odds.

Today, as I experience "normal" physical strength and energy levels after what seems like an eternity, I write to tell you all my dearest friends - don't postpone learning archery. You never know when you might need to go to battle!


Recipe to learn archery effortlessly:

1. Go to www.artofliving.org
2. Select your country and a city closest to you from the drop down menu on the top of the screen
3. Register for the next Art of Living Happiness Course
4. Join the course and watch how your life turns into a joy ride :)

Recipe for more short term joy:

Mixed Vegetables in Peanut-Coconut sauce:

Ingredients

Vegetables and spices:

10 medium sized broccoli florets
2 carrots (medium sized) - chopped into medium sized sticks
150 grams tofu - cut into medium sized cubes
20-25 fresh green beans - chopped into two or three pieces each
1 tsp Thai Curry Powder (or, if not available, use 1/2 tsp each of turmeric, coriander powder, and ginger powder)
I tbs oil

For the sauce:

1/2 cup peanuts (roasted ones taste better)
1 cup coconut milk (not too thick)
Soy sauce to taste (about 1 tablespoon is what I use)
1 Tablespoon sweet chilli sauce
1 inch piece of fresh ginger - grated.


Method:

In a high speed blender, mix and make a smooth thickish sauce using the peanuts, coconut sauce, soy sauce, chilli sauce and ginger. Set aside

In a large frying pan or wok, heat the oil, add the spices, stir and cook on medium to low heat for 30 seconds (or till you can smell the fragrance of the spices rising from the wok/pan), add the vegetables and cook on medium to high heat, while stirring constantly, for about 5 minutes. Add the peanut-cobnut sauce and mix well to quote all the vegetables. Turn down the heat to a minimum and cook in a closed pan for another 5 minutes. Remove from heat and serve immediately with fresh Basmati rice.

Anger Facts # 3

While I was in India earlier this year, I was traveling with my mommy, hubby and baby (hereinafter referred to as "my family") from Goa to Bangalore. My family, who had been more organised than me, were booked on an earlier flight and my flight was scheduled to depart 45 minutes later than theirs. I was rather unhappy with myself - they would have to wait for me in Bangalore for almost an hour - how dumb of me to not book my tickets on time!

Anyhow, we reached the airport well in time and first checked in my family onto their flight. Once they were safely in the security area, I left for the other terminal from where I needed to check into my flight. I had just finished checking in my bags when I got a call from my husband... "Our flight is 4 hours delayed!" I was shocked! "What? But what about Meera? She will get so restless! We don't even have enough baby food to last her 4 hours!" My husband was resigned to the inevitable - they were already in the security area and there was no way they could come out - all they could do was accept the situation and wait!

Somehow, I (who am usually the first to resign to acceptance) was not convinced that this was how it was going to be. But my mind didn't seem to have any answers - "what in the world can I possibly do in this situation? I am in a different terminal, the security guards are not going to dream of letting me out of the airport to get to the other terminal since my baggage is checked in; Even if I do get to the other terminal, what in the world can the airline ground staff do now that my family has already gone through security check? Would there even be available seats in any flight leaving sooner??" The questions were endless and there was no solution in sight.

Despite these doubts and impossibilities, I found myself walking towards the exit gate of my terminal, with my boarding card and my hand baggage in hand... I paused at the exit and looked around for the security guards... there were none in sight! As if on an evening walk, I danced out of my terminal and marched into the other terminal - once again, unnoticed and unquestioned! I proceeded to the airline ground staff member who had checked in my family's luggage and (conveniently) forgotten to mention that the flight was 4 hours delayed. I was quite calm... I went up to him and said, "you just checked my family's baggage into a flight that is 4 hours delayed! Why didn't you tell us? Now my family with my baby are in the security area with no extra food for the baby. This is not acceptable." The gentleman was totally unshaken: "The flight departure time is mentioned on your boarding card - you should have read it!" I was now completely amazed at the man's indifference. I walked away convinced that talking to him was like talking to a stone wall (or at best similar to writing a complaint that would end up in the bin without any action being attempted on it.)

Interestingly, my mind was still calm, but something inside me kept nudging me to continue "doing" something. I saw another ground staff member (this time a very busy looking lady with a huge walky-talky in her hand). Without pausing to think what I should say to her, I walked towards her. As soon as she looked at me, I said "where can I lodge a complaint against your airline?" Her eyes became big and concerned and she said "why madam, what happened?" I calmly repeated the exact words I had said to the previous ground staff member. This time, the reaction was entirely unexpected... She said "Madam, how many people are there inside?" I said "My husband, baby and my mom." What happened next, I have no idea. She started running around in all directions and after 5 minutes came back to me and said "another flight of ours is leaving for Bangalore in 5 minutes. Please ask your husband to come out with the baby and we will re-check their baggage." I immediately said, "what about my mom? She is 70 years old. I am not going to let her wait for 4 hours and travel alone!" The lady looked horrified for a second and said, "madam, we have only 2 seats." I didn't know what to say (I should have said, 'yes, that is enough because my baby will anyway not need a seat! She is only 13 months old!') But this didn't occur to me at the time. However, without waiting for me to speak, the lady disappeared again and came back in 2 minutes yelling, "madam, please ask them all to come out at once. We have seats for everyone!"

I called my husband and he, along with my mom and Meera, looking completely confused, came out of the security area and were immediately made to re-check their luggage, get new boarding passes and escorted to the boarding gate of the other flight!" My husband kept asking: "What happened? What did you do? How is this happening?" :D All I could say is, "I have no idea!" :D

In the mean time, I had only 10 minutes left to board my flight! I went running out of the terminal (once again, the security guards were apparently on an extended tea break!), running into my terminal, waltzing through security check and reaching my boarding gate just as the last few people were boarding.

And so it happened... despite my tardiness (in not booking my flight tickets on time), I reached Bangalore (only) 5 minutes after the rest of my family :)

Sri Sri says "When you are meditating, you don't need to show aggression. Things will happen without need of aggression for the one who meditates." :)

Today's aggression free (effortless) recipe: North-South Chickpeas

Ingredients

2 cups chickpeas (the recipe tastes MUCH better if you use small black chickpeas, called Kala Chana, rather than regular chickpeas, called Kabuli chana - See picture below) - soaked in 4-5 times the quantity of water for 12 to 24 hours.

1 cup coconut milk
8-10 fresh curry leaves - chopped into 2 or 3 pieces each
2/3 tsp cumin seeds
1/3 or 1/2 teaspoon red chili powder (Or 1 green chili - chopped)
1/2 tsp sugar or 1 tsp grated jaggery (Gur)
1.5 tsp grated fresh ginger
1 tsp Coriander powder
1/2 tsp curcuma (Turmeric) powder
1 tablespoon ghee or cooking oil
Salt to taste

Method

Pressure cook the chickpeas till soft. Drain most of the water (leave about 1/2 cup of water in). Add the 1/2 the salt and grated ginger mix well and set aside in a closed container (or in the pressure cooker itself).

In a large frying pan, heat the ghee/oil. Add the cumin seeds. Once the seeds start sizzling a little, reduce the heat to minimum and add the turmeric powder, coriander powder, chili powder and jaggery and stir well (make sure the spices don't burn - you know they are burnt if a heavyish smoke starts coming out of the pan!). Add the curry leaves, stir again. Add the coconut milk and the remaining salt and grated ginger. When the coconut milk starts simmering (this will be soon!) add the chickpeas-ginger-salt mix and stir well. Place the lid on the pan and let cook on low heat for about 5-6 minutes. Pour into a serving dish, garnish with fresh coriander leaves and serve immediately with masala-raisin rice or fresh rotis. (Recipe coming soon!)

Anger Facts # 2

The story goes that when Guruji heard the phrase “million dollar smile” he asked, "why should a smile be so expensive?" He said smiles should be given away for nothing. Anger, on the other hand, should be very expensive (i.e. expressed very rarely) for only then is it valuable. If our anger is cheap (i.e. frequent), no one will take it seriously. It will at best be an annoyance and at worse, the person expressing it will be labeled “short tempered” and “to be avoided!”

As I said in one of my older posts (Anger Facts # 1), as a child, I rarely lost my temper. In those days, I remember that when once every few months or so, I got really angry and blew my lid, everyone around me sat up in attention – the anger was noticed and the reason why it surfaced was investigated closely. Most of the time, my expression of anger solved the problem that caused it to come up. Later during my teens and early 20s, when it became “fasionable” to be angry all the time, no one took my anger seriously at all. My closest friends in law school just termed me “moody” and despite my yelling at a situation over and over again, the situation didn’t change at all! It was only after a few months of regular meditation and yoga that I realized as an experience that anger when expressed constantly, loses its oomph and its power to reform (people or situations).

But anger is also an amazing thing in many ways. Guruji makes a beautiful distinction between “getting angry” and “showing” anger. In the former, our entire being is shaken by the anger – it is often also coupled with hatred or irritation at the level of the heart. Anger of the latter kind, i.e. anger that is just shown, is a more superficial anger – it is expressed in order to achieve a purpose but is not felt at the heart level. The heart is pure and untouched by the anger and instead, such anger is expressed out of love and concern for the person to whom it is shown. A classical example would be the anger expressed by a mother towards a child who is taking her hand towards fire. First the mom will say “don’t do that… you’ll get burnt.” Eventually, if the child persists in trying to touch fire, the mother will give the child a scolding (or even a slightly sharp rap on the hand as an evil lesser than a burnt hand) showing great anger, but at the level of the heart feeling only love and concern for the child. Such a showing of anger doesn’t affect the whole human system in a negative way, but is short lived and dies immediately. Showing anger, in short, is OK and even necessary in many situations. But getting angry… well… in my experience it helps no one.

My baby girl is an expert at recognizing the different types of anger :D When I am just showing anger (which I do sometimes in order to prevent her from eating all types of stuff off the floor for example), she realizes immediately that she is doing something that’s forbidden for her own good. So she stops what she’s doing, looks and me and immediately raises her arms up, asking me to pick her up – its like her way of saying sorry, I accept my mistake, lets be friends again now :D When I am really angry and annoyed at anyone or anything, on the other hand, she just gets confused and starts crying loudly. She wants me nowhere near her, she runs instead to papa :)

Blessed are those who can distinguish between the two types of anger! Accepting the love and concern shown as anger for our own good and ignoring the other type, especially if expressed too often!

Today's recipe: Baingan ka Bharta

Note: This recipe is not recommended for you if you have high pitta (example, if you are a person prone to getting angry rather often :D). Also, Aubergine (Baingan) is a highly tamasic vegetable/fruit (i.e. might make you dull and sleepy). If you are having trouble sleeping, it will therefore of course likely help you a great deal! Finally, I rarely use onions in my cooking (because it is highly rajasic). The original Baingan Ka Bharta made Punjabi style uses a whole lot of onions... Apples, as used in this recipe, are a great satvik substitute for onions and will (hopefully) help reduce the tamasic quality of this dish!

Ingredients (for 3-4 people)

4 large aubergines (Eggplants)
1 large apple
2 large tomatoes
1.5 cups green peas
1/2 tsp lemon juice
Salt to taste
1 1/4 tsp Coriander powder
1/2 tsp Turmeric (Haldi) powder
1.5 tsp Garam Masala (you can buy it in any Indian store, or can just take some from me :D)
1 green chilli (optional) - chopped (Avoid if you have high pitta)
1.5 inch piece of Ginger - grated
3 tablespoons cooking oil
8-10 Fresh Coriander leaves - chopped

Method
Pre-heat the oven to 180° C
Put the aubergines in the oven and bake till the inside is soft and the outside is charred or easy to remove (will take about 30-40 mins). Those of you who have the good old stoves with real fire, just place the aubergines one at a time directly on the flame, rotating it periodically till the outside skin is totally charred and the inside is soft.

Remove the aubergines from the oven and let them cool down. Once cool, peel off the skin and throw it away.


Chop up or mash the flesh of the aubergines well. Add salt, Garam masala and grated ginger to the mashed aubergine and mix well. Keep aside in a closed dish.

Chop the apple and the tomatoes into small pieces. Heat oil in a large pan and add the chopped apples. When the apples are half cooked, add all the spices (Haldi, Coriander, green chilies) and the tomatoes and cook on medium heat for 2 minutes stirring with a light hand so that all the spices are properly mixed with the apples and the tomatoes. Add the peas and stir again. Place the lid on the pan and let cook for another 8-10 minutes (or till the peas are cooked) on low heat. Once the peas are cooked, add the mashed aubergine and mix well. Add more salt if needed as per your taste. Once again place the lid on the pan and let cook for 5-6 minutes. Remove from the heat, and put into a serving dish. Mix in the lemon juice and sprinkle the chopped Koriander leaves on top just before serving.

Goes best with fresh home made chapatis! :)

RIGHT NOW! Right, Now! :)

Given my Vata-Pitta Dosha with a frequent Vata imbalance (i.e. air and space element in one's system/nature that makes one forgetful and confused if out of balance, but creative and spiritual when in balance) I am often constantly on the run and busy doing several things at once. In any given moment, I often feel like doing three different things - cooking, playing with my little baby girl and working on my PhD! Meera usually wins the tug of war in my mind and has all my attention. UNLESS I need to cook for HER! :) After quickly distracting her with her favorite toys, I run into the kitchen to prepare her meal which I know she will demand rather loudly very soon. But now that Meera knows that she can get my attention just by being naughty or by coming running to me crying, her toys don't interest her for too long :(

A few days ago, as the above routine was repeating itself for perhaps the 100th time, I got really frustrated! I looked at Meera tugging at my trousers while I was trying to cook up her favorite dinner and said "Meera, you know that mom is busy doing stuff just for you right? Then why cant you just relax and wait a few moments? What you need is coming right your way - food AND all of mom's attention (while she feeds you)! But Meera continued crying and demanding that she be picked up RIGHT NOW. I finally gave up and tied her around me in the baby carry system. This made her happy, but slowed down my work in the kitchen considerably! As expected, soon enough, Meera started crying again! She was hungry. She wanted the half cooked dinner NOW! As I tried to pacify her that the food was almost done, a thought occurred to me - isn't this what we all do so often? Cry and cry for things that we want RIGHT NOW without realising that nature is probably preparing something better for us already... If only we would be patient!

I remember Guruji saying once that just like a mom arranges all the toys around her kids to distract them (so she can take care of the "other" things that need her attention around the house), God or nature arranges all the beautiful things around human beings to "distract" them. But just like the mom has one ear only for her baby, Nature is constantly listening - it provides us exactly what we need when we start crying... and often, well before that! :) Once when I was in a particularly low phase in my life (long story - left for another blog post) due to unexpected and shocking things happening one after the other in my life, I went crying to Guruji.

He said in his usual loving but firm style - "you have nothing to worry about. Look back and see, haven't all your wishes always come true? You will do everything you want to do (notwithstanding the circumstances)!" I did look back and realised that this was so true! All our (good) wishes do come true - All we have to do is be patient - everything we need for our growth (spiritual or material) is on its way and will reach us at the perfect time. :D

Today's patient recipe: Mung Beans in Coconut Curry Sauce

Ingredients (for 2-3 servings)

1 cup Mung beans (whole green Mung beans)
1/2 cup coconut milk
5-6 curry leaves - chopped (not fine - just chop each leaf into 2 or 3 parts)
1/2 tsp Turmeric powder
1/2 tsp Coriander powder
1/2 tsp cumin seeds
3/4 inch piece of ginger - grated
1 green chilli - chopped (optional)
Salt to taste
4-5 cups water
3 tablespoons Cooking Oil

1/2 lemon
10-12 Fresh coriander leaves

Method

Soak the mung beans in 5 times the amount of water (i.e. 5 cups or more) overnight. Drain the water, add four to five cups of fresh water and pressure cook till the beans are cooked. (If you don't have a pressure cooker, cook it the regular way on low flame - it will just take a little longer... usually around 45 mins) Add the coconut milk, ginger and salt to the cooked lentils and set aside.

In a separate pan (maybe a small frying pan or tadka pan), heat the oil. Put in the cumin seeds. Once they start making a small sizzling sound, reduce the flame to minimum and add the turmeric powder, coriander powder, and chopped green chilli. Stir gently for 10-15 seconds. Add the chopped curry leaves and stir again for 10-12 seconds. Pour this spice mix into the cooked lentils, stir quickly and immediately close the lid of the lentil containing pan (to hold in the aroma and flavour).

Serve while still hot by pouring the lentils into soup bowls, laced with a dash of lemon juice and garnished with fresh coriander leaves :)

Anger Facts # 1

As a child, I lost my temper very rarely. As I grew older and hit the teens, it became increasingly more fashionable to follow in Amitabh Bachchan's footsteps and be called the "Angry young (wo)man" and idolize James Dean to become a "Rebel without a cause." It was cool to yell and shout at everyone in general, and my parents in particular (especially my dear mom, who is a truly sweet natured and cool headed person!).

Somewhere along the way, I lost the habit (and interest) in meditation, yoga and everything to do with spirituality (remember? I was introduced to TM at the age of 11). But as mom's go (they are a skillful and patient lot who have perfected the art of striking just when the time is right), my mom skillfully got me back into yoga and meditation through one of Art of Living's advanced programs called the DSN. This was in 2002. Since then, (perhaps as a result of regular breathing exercises and meditation) slowly but surely, I have been going back to the childhood nature of hardly ever losing my temper... or so I thought until recently!

In Jan this year, came my beautiful baby daughter Meera (see picture below)

and with her came bundles of joy, laughter, tears and STRESS! Back came my old (painstakingly nurtured and developed) habit of yelling at my mom. I particularly watched (often in amazement) how easily I got annoyed at my mom in the kitchen. You see, I like my kitchen to be just as 'I' like it! "I" can create a mess but no one else is permitted to do so. Although at least some working parts of my brain told me that mom was being a sweetheart helping out so much, and I had no business to be anything but grateful, BANG came another round of bad temper, angry comments and irritated instructions! Mom, as patient as ever, never said a word in retort.

A few days ago, I was happily cooking away in my kitchen, when my (messenger from Guruji) husband came waltzing in, (in a rather good mood) and declared that he would cook lunch for us for a change. I jumped and accepted the loving suggestion. Immediately after this sweet exchange of words and looks, came several angry (and annoyed) comments from him about how messy the whole kitchen was! I was shocked and distressed and became angrier and angrier as he threw several more angry remarks and instructions at me. In sum and substance, he wanted the kitchen to be just as HE liked it. I marched out of the kitchen thinking how terrible it was that he could create a mess and clean it as and when he wanted and I was not permitted to make a mess while I so lovingly cooked for him! I would never cook for him again! >:(

As I marched out, one of the few parts of the brain still working despite the anger attack, nagged me - "isnt this exactly the way you behave with mom? Good getting a taste of your own medicine!" :(

Guruji says that we should see every situation in life (including unpleasant ones) as post meant for us being delivered by a postman (the other person in the situation, for eg the person who is scolding you). I never really understood what he meant until that morning a few days ago. My husband was only the postman - he was delivering a message meant for me - a message asking me to look at my own behavior and re-assess whether it is necessary or appropriate and how it affects people around me. Guruji also says that when we dont react to (or are unaffected by) a situation, the person who is behaving badly will realise their mistake. That my husband was just the postman became clearer to me as he dropped his anger and lovingly served lunch immediately after I walked out in a huff. I, on the other hand, held on to the anger for quite sometime as the above realization was hard (for my ego) to swallow and even harder to digest :) Once digested, it is proving to have several health benefits including more gratitude for my mom, more respect and love for my ever patient husband, and most importantly, better working brain cells :)

Today's recipes - Pitta Pacifying Shakes (to calm the angry young man or woman in you :D)

Fire extinguisher #1: Watermelon Mint Juice (For 1 serving)
Ingredients:
Two large slices of watermelon (seedless or remove as many seeds as you can) - preferably cooled overnight in the refrigerator
3-4 mint leaves
a dash of lemon juice (optional)

Method:
Blend all together in a mixer - drink immediately!

Fire extinguisher # 2: Almond-date shake (For 4 servings)
Ingredients:
60 gm almonds (soak overnight, remove skin in the morning)
800ml water (cold, perhaps refrigerated overnight if you live in a hot country)
6-8 dates (soak overnight in refrigerator, remove skin and seed)
A dash of cinnamon powder (avoid if your temper is out of control)
4 table spoons of maple syrup or Agave syrup

Method:
Put almonds, 300ml water in blender and beat thoroughly till all the almonds are fully crushed. Add the rest of the water (500ml) and beat again.
With a large sieve (with small holes), sieve the almond-water mix to remove the almond pulp. What comes out is pure home made almond milk :) (You can use the pulp in other recipes - will suggest some soon!)

Put the almond milk back in the blender (without the pulp), add the dates, cinnamon powder and maple/agave syrup and blend again - several times till the dates are almost fully "dissolved".

Pour out into glasses and serve immediately.